Envious

I had fun @ the steamboat session last Friday evening... That night I found myself attracted to one of my colleague whom had joined the project about 6 months ago...
I already knew my colleage is engaged when she first joined the project, hence I didnt pay much attention to her... However, that night at the steamboat... something about her just shine to me and I found myself thinking of her the whole weekend.

The day after (saturday)I attended my ex colleagues' wedding banquet and I was happy for her, on the other hand I was envious and getting to be a little depressed too. I kept thinking if only I had been a better partner, things may be still rosy with E and she would still be by my side... I would have someone to run to, to do things for, to listen to and be listened to, someone to talk to about anything thing in the world... I know I should not think like this, however it was exactly how I felt...

Tonight we went for dinner + drink after work and the same colleague was there too. I was very objective ie I dont allow myself to think too much, rather just enjoy her company for the night... I was envious of her finance and I also learn something too... Her finance proposed to her while on holiday to Bangkok... I too want to propose to the love of my life. I too want to spend my life with someone I love dearly and who is right for me...

Oh my soulmate, can you hear/see/feel me longing for you to come into my life?